Seriously I am MAD at my roommate! She told me she needed her boundaries to be clearer and I said that was fine with me (that was last week). I decided not to talk to her anymore because she said she needed her boundaries. I can live with that, I can work with that. But then she got pissed at me whenever I blocked off her attempts of prying into my life! Said she would worry about me and that was natural, bla bla bla… Seriously, that’s alright to say if she wants to say that but I don’t need people to worry about me! I don’t need people to RAT ME OUT to the counselor I’m seeing because she doesn’t know if she can leave me alone for a week. HA! That makes me so so so so MAD! What business is it of hers? Why can’t she just quit nosing around in my life. First she’s upset that I do talk to her, then she’s upset that I don’t. Seriously – I just want her out of my life if she doesn’t quit being nosy and worried. It’s NONE OF HER FUCKING BUSINESS!
Because she ratted me out to my psych and therapist I only marginally escaped being hospitalized!!!!! Thank you, jerk, for ratting me out. Now I have to deal with the shit she created. I am not a threat to myself and even if I were – it’s none of her FUCKING business!!!! If I decide to kill myself then that’s MY thing. If I decide to get fucking drunk and then hang myself that’s MY business. If I want to slit my wrist that’s MY business! Not hers! And I don’t understand why she couldn’t keep her mouth shut! I HATE her but unfortunately she’s not around until a week from today so I can’t even let it out on her, I have to let it sit and stew and just think about what I would like to do with her!!! I would love to beat her bloody! I would love to tell her what I think of her and I would love for her to understand that it’s NONE OF HER BUSINESS to go talk about me behind my back. And to my counselor! To the one person who should be there for me and my problems! The one person who I felt comfortable talking to! I HATE MY ROOMMATE! I wish I could send her a text right now but she’s out of the country!!!!!
So what – I could kill myself and tell her it happened because SHE couldn’t keep her mouth shut. Because she clearly doesn’t care about me. She’s worried about her own skin and her own involvement in my life. She IS NOT INVOLVED in my life and she has no right to worry about me! Why do I have to fucking deal with talking my psychiatrist out of having me hospitalized? Why do I have to worry about hospital bills when I’m perfectly capable of dealing with me?????? WHY DID SHE NOT FUCKING KEEP HER MOUTH SHUT????
ARRRGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I want to beat her to a pulp and let her feel the pain I feel for being betrayed like that. I’m self-sufficient, I’m self-reliant, I can do this on my own!