Update

So I didn’t need to get stitches after all and I saw my psych yesterday and today. She wants to see me tomorrow, too! I’m off Celexa now (which was the antidepressant that I took) cuz it made me bipolar-high. I was also given Seroquel which should have made me sleep about 5 hours ago. I’m still awake!! And I took 200mg of it! The psych that half of one pill would make me sleep but then she made me call her every hour to check on me. I took half of one pill, then the other half after an hour and a whole one after another hour. She was amazed I wasn’t dead down like a tree…. amazing. My body seems to be overreacting to all the medication I’m given! 😦
I also didn’t need stitches today which is good – though I cut some more yesterday and today. I’m still fighting the need right now to do it again which is why I’m writing like crazy on here, trying to get my thoughts together but they’re racing like crazy in my mind! And I want to cut, I want to hurt, I want to FEEL something! But I don’t want to disturb my therapist or my psychiatrist – I feel like I should get better but I’m not (but I want to!). But I still cut myself and do hurtful things. It’s crazy!

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